Post by tt on Jul 8, 2005 15:44:04 GMT -5
This is a copy of a letter I sent to the Old Dutch Food Company in St Paul, Mn.. Requesting help in obtaining their new flavored potato chips.
I thought you might get a kick out of reading it!
Customer Service Dept.:
Urgent message, need your service immediately, send help today!!
To whom it may concern:
There just aren't enough of your "Parmesan and Garlic" Kettle Chips on the shelves in our local grocery stores!
These chips are the best!!!
They pack a whole lot more flavor in them than can be had in your "Original" Kettle Chips. A bag of which I just now open and tried for the first time. Sadly I was disappointed in the flavor of the "Original" Kettle Chips.
Please send your delivery trucks filled with your "Parmesan and Garlic" flavored Kettle Chips, back to Cherokee, Iowa!
I've checked with both the Fareway, and Hy-Vee Grocery stores here in Cherokee; and both are sold out of the "Parmesan and Garlic" Kettle Chips. They say your delivery trucks only come to Cherokee twice a week!
What gives with that?!
You can't leave us hanging that long with out your "Parmesan and Garlic" Kettle Chips!!
I must accept some responsibility for this shortage, even though I only bought one bag of these delicious chips! I did however make the mistake of emailing several people nation wide of the great flavor that these "Parmesan and Garlic" Kettle Chips, possess! Obviously the word of mouth has destroyed my chances of acquiring a bag today!
Not to mention all of my coworkers that I shared the first bag with!
My God! What a fool I was, for being so generous with my fellow mankind! To have them turn on me, and deprive me of these wonderful crunchy morsels from Heaven!
I don't condone the irresponsible habits of Addicts, but I admit after having tried your "Parmesan and Garlic Kettle Chips" just one time, I am hopelessly addicted to them!
With the obvious shortages of your delivery personnel, and their inability to for see that your "Parmesan and Garlic" Kettle Chips would be so popular; I'm sure no thought was given by you as to how to tend to people's addiction to this product.
I implore you to start at once setting up neighborhood Addiction Centers, for your customers who can't get an immediate ( fix, of your "Parmesan and Garlic" Kettle Chips ).
Nothing will suffice for the fantastic flavor of your "Parmesan and Garlic" Kettle Chips!
In pale comparison I have resorted to doing Parmesan and Garlic shooters, to suffice my need of this flavor addiction I have.
I start by pouring out on the table in front of me, a bag of your "Original" Kettle Chips. Then I pour a Tbsp. of olive oil on my wrist, and liberally sprinkle Parmesan Cheese, and Garlic Powder on the Olive Oil. Then I shovel a hand full of your "Original" Kettle Chips in my mouth, chewing half of the crunch out of them to make room for the ( Flavor Fix ). I then lick my wrist clean of the Parmesan Cheese and Garlic Powder, and munch the whole mess down my throat!
Oh God! Look at what a shambles my life has come to, in just 2 days!
What a wretched wreck of humanity I have become, Oh! the levels of inhumanity that I have succumbed to, just to feed my cravings for your "Parmesan and Garlic" flavored Kettle Chips!
Please for the love of God, send your delivery trucks back to Cherokee immediately, and fill them to the brim, with your delicious "Parmesan and Garlic" Kettle Chips!!!
Do It!
DO IT NOW!!!!!!
Sincerely, An addicted fan!
Dave T.
I thought you might get a kick out of reading it!
Customer Service Dept.:
Urgent message, need your service immediately, send help today!!
To whom it may concern:
There just aren't enough of your "Parmesan and Garlic" Kettle Chips on the shelves in our local grocery stores!
These chips are the best!!!
They pack a whole lot more flavor in them than can be had in your "Original" Kettle Chips. A bag of which I just now open and tried for the first time. Sadly I was disappointed in the flavor of the "Original" Kettle Chips.
Please send your delivery trucks filled with your "Parmesan and Garlic" flavored Kettle Chips, back to Cherokee, Iowa!
I've checked with both the Fareway, and Hy-Vee Grocery stores here in Cherokee; and both are sold out of the "Parmesan and Garlic" Kettle Chips. They say your delivery trucks only come to Cherokee twice a week!
What gives with that?!
You can't leave us hanging that long with out your "Parmesan and Garlic" Kettle Chips!!
I must accept some responsibility for this shortage, even though I only bought one bag of these delicious chips! I did however make the mistake of emailing several people nation wide of the great flavor that these "Parmesan and Garlic" Kettle Chips, possess! Obviously the word of mouth has destroyed my chances of acquiring a bag today!
Not to mention all of my coworkers that I shared the first bag with!
My God! What a fool I was, for being so generous with my fellow mankind! To have them turn on me, and deprive me of these wonderful crunchy morsels from Heaven!
I don't condone the irresponsible habits of Addicts, but I admit after having tried your "Parmesan and Garlic Kettle Chips" just one time, I am hopelessly addicted to them!
With the obvious shortages of your delivery personnel, and their inability to for see that your "Parmesan and Garlic" Kettle Chips would be so popular; I'm sure no thought was given by you as to how to tend to people's addiction to this product.
I implore you to start at once setting up neighborhood Addiction Centers, for your customers who can't get an immediate ( fix, of your "Parmesan and Garlic" Kettle Chips ).
Nothing will suffice for the fantastic flavor of your "Parmesan and Garlic" Kettle Chips!
In pale comparison I have resorted to doing Parmesan and Garlic shooters, to suffice my need of this flavor addiction I have.
I start by pouring out on the table in front of me, a bag of your "Original" Kettle Chips. Then I pour a Tbsp. of olive oil on my wrist, and liberally sprinkle Parmesan Cheese, and Garlic Powder on the Olive Oil. Then I shovel a hand full of your "Original" Kettle Chips in my mouth, chewing half of the crunch out of them to make room for the ( Flavor Fix ). I then lick my wrist clean of the Parmesan Cheese and Garlic Powder, and munch the whole mess down my throat!
Oh God! Look at what a shambles my life has come to, in just 2 days!
What a wretched wreck of humanity I have become, Oh! the levels of inhumanity that I have succumbed to, just to feed my cravings for your "Parmesan and Garlic" flavored Kettle Chips!
Please for the love of God, send your delivery trucks back to Cherokee immediately, and fill them to the brim, with your delicious "Parmesan and Garlic" Kettle Chips!!!
Do It!
DO IT NOW!!!!!!
Sincerely, An addicted fan!
Dave T.
"TT"
